Oh little did you know...

Ugh.. I can't help it. Yesterday you admit you liked me. Now today you try to make something happen. I already told you I wasn't ready. Why can't you understand? I always say "I hate you," why can't you just believe it is true? I don't know what to do anymore. I am officially confused and lost. I told you, you shouldn't have fallen. I knew bad things would have happened. Yeah, I know it's a crush, but in the end it will hurt us both. I don't want to see you hurt. That hurts me so much more than you think. I liked how you said that you're willing to wait, but it's not worth it. I am not worth it. Trust me when I say it, because truly I'm not. Look at what I caused! I can't believe I created all this.. I know you probably hate me now, but I have my reasons. All this isn't worth it. Maybe I wanted to give it a try, but I can't. I still don't get how and why you would ever fall for me. Believe me when I say, you'll find the perfect girl for yourself, because I know I can never be her. You'll be happier this way. I hate seeing you sad. Please, just let go. It will be worth it, and I promise you that you won't regret it. When you find the right girl, you can thank me then. This girl won't ever disappoint you. She will always know what to do in order to make you smile. I can never be that girl. You don't know how much it is hurting me right now... but it is for the best. We are just young, trust me that this is just a phase. You don't realize how much I care, I want you to have the best in life. I want you to be happy. With me, you will never be happy. I can't let that happen. I told you, you should have stayed away. Just let it be. I get it if you don't want to see me or ever talk to me again. I get it. Only if you knew why. I'm just trying to be the best I can, making everyone around me happy. Too bad I'm cursed with this bad luck. I hurt everyone around me. I'm sorry for hurting you. I never intended to. I never knew that this will happen. I want to tell you so bad, but you'll think I'm stupid. Plus, you have a secret admire already. I can't hurt her. I never liked hurting people, but I do. Whatever I do, in the end I hurt someone, either mentally or physically. I don't want us to be on bad terms though, I still want us to be close friends and always chill with each other. I think I might have ruined that. I get it if you won't ever talk to me. I have my reasons, but I'm scared. I want to tell you so badly, but you would be less hurt this way. You probably think my reasons are pretty minor. It will never work. In the end I'm suppose to be alone, so I can see everyone happy and let everyone have their ways. I just want EVERYONE happy. Why must it be this hard? Even if I did agree, we wouldn't be able to get anywhere... maybe we aren't meant for each other. You made me think so much. I told you, I make many sins. Why would you want me, when there are SO MANY GIRLS out there? Others who are basically perfect for you. Me on the other hand, who isn't. You'll end up hurt with me. Oh how much you really know what's going up in this head of mind. If you did, you would know why. Probably think I'm stupid, but I'm willing to let you go if it makes you happy. Oh little did you know, the truth which lies behind all this. Just promise me, that you will be happy. Why must things be so complicated? You should just forget about me, it will make everything so much better and easier.